Inspired by "Rip Van Winkle," a classic American short story by Washington Irving

In the quiet embrace of the Sierra Nevada foothills, there lived a man named Rip Van Democrat. Rip was a paradoxical creature, a blend of woke awareness and blissful ignorance, an embodiment of the modern-day oxymoron: responsibly irresponsible. His life was a tapestry woven with the threads of nature’s melody, the rhythmic clatter of protests, and the incessant buzz of Twitter debates. Accompanying him on this peculiar journey was his loyal dog, Doge, whose existence was as much an internet meme as it was flesh and fur.

Rip's days were an artful dodge from the relentless drumbeat of Trump's America. He found sanctuary in the mountains, where executive orders seemed as distant as bedtime stories scribbled on napkins and signed with crayons. One fateful day, Rip decided to embark on another legendary hike with Doge, aiming to escape the cacophony of Fox News and the endless barrage of tweets that dictated the nation's collective mood swings.

As they ascended the mountain, Rip encountered a curious band of men. These were no ordinary mountain dwellers; they sported MAGA hats but wielded Xbox controllers instead of rifles. Engrossed in digital warfare, their screens flickered with explosions and pixelated chaos. Nearby lay a basket filled with mushrooms so bizarre they seemed to glow with an unearthly hue, screaming "FDA unapproved" with every pulsating shimmer.

"Hey there, fellow patriot," one of the men called out over the digital gunfire. "Join us for some shrooms and games? It'll be yuge!"

Rip, ever the seeker of escapism and perhaps a touch too curious for his own good, accepted the invitation. The mushrooms tasted like freedom seasoned with a hint of regret, and soon after, a wave of drowsiness enveloped him.

When Rip awoke, he found himself on a bed of pine needles, Doge enthusiastically licking his face with the fervor of a thousand internet memes. The sun was setting, casting an orange glow eerily reminiscent of a certain president's complexion. Rubbing his eyes, Rip looked around. The mountains appeared unchanged, yet something felt amiss.

As Rip descended back to civilization, he noticed peculiar transformations. The roads were lined with billboards hawking Trump NFTs—digital masterpieces resembling poorly edited stock photos. Every car bore bumper stickers proclaiming "Keep America Confused Again." The airwaves teemed with infomercials for Trump-branded everything—steaks, ties, even Trump University Online (now boasting 50% more fake degrees).

Rip's village had morphed into a dystopian theme park celebrating all things Trump. The local school had been replaced by Trump Academy for the Gifted, where history was taught through tweets and science dismissed as fake news. The library had metamorphosed into a MAGA merchandise store, peddling everything from red hats to Ivanka's latest line of designer gas masks.

Rip wandered through the streets in disbelief. In the town square, a large crowd gathered around a giant golden statue of Trump holding a smartphone aloft like Lady Liberty's torch. The crowd chanted slogans like "Four more years!" and "Make America Gyrate Again!"

Approaching an old friend who was busy selling "Covfefe" mugs at a makeshift stand, Rip asked bewilderedly, "What happened here?"

His friend regarded him as if he'd inquired whether water was wet. "You've been asleep for years, Rip! Trump won not just one but two terms! America's now the world's biggest reality show!"

Rip's jaw dropped as his friend elaborated on how executive orders were now decided by spin-the-wheel games on live TV and how governance had been replaced by a subscription service called "Democracy Plus."

Rip couldn't fathom this new reality—was it life or just fantasy? He returned to his old home, only to find it transformed into an Airbnb themed after Trump's Mar-a-Lago. Doge barked at the new occupants—a family donning matching "I Survived Trump's Second Term" t-shirts.

Sitting on his porch, trying to process this altered world order, Rip realized some things remained unchanged. The mountains still stood tall, Doge still wagged his tail at every passerby, and Rip still possessed an uncanny ability to nap through major historical events.

With a sigh and a chuckle, Rip accepted his fate as the man who slept through Trump's America. Leaning back in his chair, he muttered to Doge, "Well, buddy, at least we missed the tariff disaster and those culture wars on woke and DEI."

Doge responded with a bark that sounded suspiciously like laughter. And so, Rip Van Democrat settled back into his village, now a legend in his own right—the man who napped through history and woke up just in time for the credits to roll on America's strangest episode yet. But then he actually woke up and decided to move to Canada. 

OR HE COULD JUST ATTEND

April 19 Protest Rally and March 1-3pm · Indivisible https://www.mobilize.us/indivisible/event/769023/

April 19 National Day of Protest · Mobilize https://www.mobilize.us/mobilize/event/773576/ 

April 19, 1775 was the start date of the American Revolution. The next Hands Off/50501 Movement will be on Saturday, April 19.

We must protest far and wide on April 19. Start spreading the word and talking about it now and everyday all day! Everyone has to start commenting directly on the news sites. Fox News, CNN, NBC, ABC News, NewsNation, PBS etc... all of them! Regardless of the topic of their news post!

It is very important that these demonstrations are nonviolent. Do not engage with counter protestors.

50501 — 50 protests, 50 states, 1 movement https://www.fiftyfifty.one/ 

Big Education Ape: HANDS OFF! THE RESISTANCE CHRONICLES: TRUMP, MUSK, AND THE DEMOCRATIC COALITION'S RAINBOW OF RIGHTEOUS FURY https://bigeducationape.blogspot.com/2025/04/hands-off-resistance-chronicles-trump.html