Human Interest Real People Real People Weddings Dad Says He Is 'Devastated' His Daughter Is Having Her Stepfather Walk Her Down the Aisle at Her Wedding "I’m assuming he will also be the one to have a father-daughter dance," the dad said By Nicholas Rice Nicholas Rice Nicholas Rice is a Senior Editor for PEOPLE Magazine. He began working with the brand as an Editorial Intern in early 2020, before later transitioning to staff positions. Nicholas writes and edits anywhere between 7 to 9 stories per day on average for PEOPLE, spanning across each vertical the brand covers. People Editorial Guidelines Published on March 30, 2025 05:30AM EDT 216 Comments A bridge being walked down the aisle at her wedding by her father (stock image). Photo: Getty A father is contemplating skipping his daughter's upcoming wedding because she chose her stepfather to walk her down the aisle over him. Writing anonymously to The New York Times' "Ask the Therapist" column, the man explained that his daughter, 37, is getting married for a second time at a church, where he said "traditions are in play." Further detailing that his daughter's mother "divorced me 36 years ago," the father said he "was an active and present dad" and he has "a good relationship" with his child, but she has "asked her stepfather to give her away" during her nuptials. "I’m assuming he will also be the one to have a father-daughter dance," the man continued, adding: "This has crushed me. I didn’t say anything to her other than, 'Oh, okay.' But I was devastated." Never miss a story — sign up for PEOPLE's free daily newsletter to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories. A bride and a groom cutting a wedding cake (stock image). Getty 88 Kindergarteners Create 'Heartfelt' Centerpieces Defining What Love Is for Teacher's Wedding (Exclusive) Continuing to air his grievances about his daughter's wedding and her stepfather's involvement, the dad said he is considering skipping the event. "I don’t want to go and watch this other man (my ex and I had a foul divorce with much anger) walk my daughter down the aisle or dance with her," he wrote. The PEOPLE Puzzler crossword is here! How quickly can you solve it? Play now! And though he admitted that he is aware the ordeal is "not about me," the dad said he can't help but feel "hurt." "I also don’t think it’ll be that crushing to her if I’m a no-show," he added. Men gathered together at a wedding (stock image). getty Couple Has the Ultimate Full Circle Ceremony at the Public Library After Bookstore Proposal As the father asked if he was "being childish, or are my feelings justified," Lori Gottlieb, a psychotherapist, responded, offering the man differing ways to look at the situation. "These traditional fatherly roles — walking the bride down the aisle, sharing a dance — can carry enormous emotional significance for some people," Gottlieb wrote, before adding, "But there’s another way to look at this." "Given that your daughter wants her stepfather’s involvement in her wedding, it sounds like he has been a warm and meaningful presence in her life. Could you step back and appreciate him not as a rival or replacement in your daughter’s life, but as a positive addition for her?" the best-selling author questioned. "She has two present, caring men that are invested in her well-being, which for her might feel like a gift. Can you see both your fatherly roles as a collaborative investment in her life rather than as a competition?" added Gottlieb. Close Leave a Comment