Mom Says a Teacher Who Offered to Drive Her Son to School Asked for Gas Money: 'It Feels Like a Shakedown'

A mom says she's feeling like a teacher at her son's school is shaking her down for gas money after offering to do her a favor and drive her son to and from school.

The woman wrote on Mumsnet, a popular U.K.-based forum, that she lives in a remote area and is currently also caring for her elderly parents. Her neighbor, who is also a teacher at her kid's school, offered to drive him to and from school every day, which is about a 30-minute drive away, meaning "an hour round trip drive twice a day," she explained.

"The afternoon pickup requires [me] leaving home at 2:30 p.m., making it impossible to commit to any big work trips or projects or get to and from my Dad’s house in time. It’s a tricky situation. I am grateful for the lifts," she wrote in a follow-up to her post.

She noted that she initially offered the teacher gas money, but she refused, saying that she was going that way anyway. "At the end of each term, I’ve sent her a gift to say thank you. Each time, I’ve had to chase up to check she’s received it — no thanks forthcoming," the mom said. But the teacher recently reached out to her saying that her expenses were increasing now that her own son, who drives himself to a different school each day, just got his first car.

This is where things got complicated, the mom shared. The woman said that she then asked the teacher to send her bank details over so that she could send her the gas money, making good on the request. The teacher sent her own son's bank info to the woman to make a transfer. "So effectively she has decided that she wants someone to subsidize her son's new car and that someone is me," she wrote.

"If she had given me her own bank details, I would’ve just paid it, despite feeling that she should’ve asked me initially — not a year into this. But being given her son's bank details has made me really mad. Feels like a shakedown. Coupled with this, I lost my mom recently and my elderly father has been seriously ill. I’ve had to do an awful lot of juggling and rely on the [rides]. She knows this," the woman added, leading her to feel as though the teacher is taking advantage of her.

In the comments to the woman's post, people had more questions, with many asking her if she couldn't find another arrangement so that she and her son's transport wasn't reliant on a teacher at his school. "I don't understand where you're coming from at all. This woman is being extremely kind. The school run every day is a massive favor. It was kind of her not to take a contribution [for gas] before but she wasn't obliged to show that kindness," someone said.

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"Maybe you could reframe the way you're looking at it. Instead of thinking she's trying to shake you down, accept that it's reasonable for someone to expect gas money if they're giving you a regular lift, and you were fortunate to get the lifts for a year without having to contribute," another person suggested.

Many others thought that it shouldn't matter where the money ultimately landed. Someone broke it down for the woman, "The teacher is doing a favor for your son. By paying money into her son's bank account, you will be doing a favor for her son,"