On or about June 13, 2022, I received a 48 hour notice to meet with my principal concerning..."VERBAL ABUSE." For several days I wrecked my brain trying to figure out what I could have said. My erstwhile chapter leader assured me not to worry. That if this were real verbal abuse OSI would be taking the lead. 

So we finally meet and I find out what I am being accused of. Before I continue be sure you are sitting down and/or holding onto a loved one. This will be quite shocking to the system. 

I was accused of telling the student that I will call her mother. This shit cannot be made up. 

I told the student I would call the student's mother. Oh the humanity.

All this happened on May 5, 2022. It was a sixth grade class. The students were doing independent work, and I was doing what any teacher would do. I was walking around helping and supporting students. However, this one particular student was not doing the work assigned and instead using the class time as a social gathering with students sitting nearby. 

I decided that since I am the educator and the adult I would do what I learned many years ago. Non-verbal communication. I just walked over and stood behind the student to facilitate the student getting back to work and to end the socializing. 

Immediately the student talked to me as if I were the child. "Move away from me," "I don't want you behind me." For some dumb reason I assumed I am the teacher and the student is a student. I decided not to move due to the belief that once I walked away the student would revert to using the time for socializing instead of classwork. 

The attitude continued. I said if this continues I will call home. Something I have heard and seen in the school all year. Even by the favored gentry. Even the Heavyweight Champion of the school. 

So the meeting was on a Thursday. I wrote this piece on June 19, 2022. Two days later, June 21, 2022 as I was leaving at 2:40 PM EDT I was asked by a secretary (who felt horrible) to sign a letter to my file. I said that I have to get to my per session position and wished to go over the letter with my chapter leader (She was not in that day). I also mentioned I have 24 hours (I could be wrong) and will take care of this matter the following day. 

The very next morning I get called in to meet with Numero Uno. Numero Uno admonishes me for refusing to sign. I never refused to sign I told Numero Uno. I just wished for time to digest and take in the letter (I did make a photo copy). I did bring up that in the letter Numero Uno wrote that I was trying to "intimidate" the student. SMFH!

Have you ever read Chancellor's Regulation A-421? It is so vaguely written that anything can be considered verbal abuse. 

A. Verbal abuse1 is defined as language (written2 or oral) about or directed toward students, that: 

1. Belittles, embarrasses or subjects students to ridicule; or 

2. Has or would have the effect of unreasonably and substantially interfering with a student’s educational performance or ability to participate in or benefit from an educational program, school-sponsored activity or any other aspect of a student’s education; or 

3. Has or would have the effect of unreasonably and substantially interfering with a student’s mental, emotional, or physical well-being; or 

4.Reasonably causes or would reasonably be expected to cause a student to fear for his/her physical safety; or

5. Reasonably causes or would reasonably be expected to cause physical injury or emotional harm to a student.

Where is the line drawn? What happens if I'm talking to a student about baseball? The student tells me they are a Mets fan and I say I am a Yankees fan? Or that the Yankees have owned the Mets for years in New York. Could I be written up?

Can a teacher be written up for telling one student that he or she needs to improve? Or by telling a student that their behavior will keep them in at gym?

What of using ClassDojo? What of any in class behavior chart? 

Funny how Numero Uno decided to write me up while my return to the school was up in the air. 

I got my first bachelor pad in my hometown way back in July of 1990. It was awesome. A studio apartment directly behind an IHOP, at a main intersection, shops within walking distance, and best of all a Metro-North station a quarter of a mile walk.

Being a groovy single guy the other married men with families on my floor lived somewhat vicariously through me. They thought I was cool. I didn't think they were. Not 100% true, there was one dad who almost turned me off to getting married and having children.

Jughead and Big Ethel lived diagonally across the hall from me. They had a 2 bedroom. Both were portly and ugly as sin. However, the had a gorgeous toe-headed little boy named Reggie. Back in 1990 Reggie was about 4 years old.

Anyway, and I got this second hand, when Reggie was born, Big Ethel suffered from sever post-partum depression to the point where she was hospitalized. Which is an explanation, I think, of what I am about to share.

Being that Reggie was an only child, Reggie bore the brunt of everything, good and bad, in their home. Sadly, from what I heard and saw, in person, in the hallway, and in my apartment with my door closed sitting outside on the balcony while blasting Rush, was not right.

Reggie was a handful and cried and had tantrums quite a bit. Every time he cried and/or threw a tantrum I would hear from either Jughead or Big Ethel, or both, yelling at Reggie, "IF YOU DON'T STOP CRYING WE ARE GOING TO CALL THE POLICE!" And soon the wailing, the tantrums would get worse.

'IF YOU DON'T STOP CRYING THE POLICE WILL COME AND TAKE YOU AWAY!" Or, "WE HATE YOU, YOU ARE NO GOOD!!!"

Once when my dad came to pick something up in my mailbox Big Ethel was in the lobby ripping apart a crying Reggie. Big Ethel pointed at my dad and screamed at Reggie, "SEE, THE POLICE ARE HERE TO TAKE YOU AWAY!" My dad being the man that he was said, "Hey lady, don't get me involved with your crap."

In retrospect I wished I had called Child Protective Services, or better yet, told Jughead to cut it out. But being a renter in a co-op building and with Jughead on the board, I never did.

They sold the apartment and moved away in the mid 90's. Reggie would be about 28 years old now. I always wonder what became of him. If he was able to turn out well adjusted and able to bury the scars that his parents imprinted on him.

But can you imagine the hell this boy must have gone through? Being told almost day in and day out that he is no good, that his parents wished him gone? What kind of self esteem did he lack? His parents, obviously were not only abusive, but stupid. Stupid, for the way they treated this boy, but stupid because in an apartment building everyone can hear everything.

But back to Reggie. How much damage has he suffered? Was he able to overcome it? Has he turned to substance abuse to ease the pain or has he turned to counseling? Is the pain or anger living inside of him fighting to stay in but every now and then it bubbles up to the surface and consumes him, stops him from living?

I share this (And I know there are some begging me to get to the point!) because we all can empathize with the abuse this boy was raised in. We all know what effects the abuse can have on a child verbally abused throughout his most formative years.

But what about the abuse teachers receive? Not from colleagues, not from parents or students, but the very people that we look to for leadership as Reggie did, our principals? How much can one take of constant day in and day out abuse?

Teachers hear, "Deal with it," or "You're an adult." To both, The Crack Team says hogwash!

Part of the reason I believe teachers get into teaching is that we are sensitive and feel others pain easily. Like in the Star Trek TOS episode "The Empath," we really do feel others pain.

So because our senses, our antenna is so attuned to what others feel, when we are berated, when we are abused, when we are demeaned it hits us harder than it does other adults in other professions.

Verbal abuse not only hurts but it is damaging as well. It is damaging when we are screamed at, when we are told, or it's implied that we are no good. We are torn up inside when we feel we are being singled out, being treated in a disparage way.

And unlike Reggie, who can withdraw into himself, we can't. We have to be on. We have to "turn that frown upside down." Where do we get the relief? Who can we take it out on? Too often and sadly it is taken out on our loved ones. Our loved ones are made to suffer, our loved ones then become damaged.

But the world loves and wants to help a little boy. The world has learned to hate and ignore a teacher. But abuse is abuse. Teachers do not deserve to be abused.

At my school we have a teacher in Club Gitmo, oops, I meant to say Guantanamo Bay Detention Center, oops I meant The Rubber Room for allegedly using swear words directed at a student. Funny how one's entire career can be ruined for an allegation.

Also at my wonderful school we have a "teacher" that has been accused by an entire class of putting them down, putting their lives down, putting their parents down. This "teacher" has belittled students for their living conditions, called the students losers, their parents losers as well. This "teacher" is not in The Rubber Room. Does anyone notice some sort of disparity? I certainly do.

Suffice it to say this "teacher" is protected. Nepotism works this way. So does reaching the level of your incompetence. It seems this teacher shares much of the DNA of Dear Principal John Deacon's gatekeeper, henchman, capo, Judenrat, or whatever. So naturally John Deacon heads the exclusive blue ribbon panel of itself looking into this matter and comes back and claims that after an exhaustive investigation the charges were unfounded. Case closed.

Only that there never was an investigation. Again Dear Principal John Deacon lies. Again Dear Principal John Deacon cares only for itself. Again Dear Principal John Deacon underestimates the parents.

The parents are getting their mojo and now are calling into OSI directly. Good for them! But they better be careful, because just as OSI is sweeping Numb Nuts assaults on children under the rug, so soon will OSI be doing the same for the "teacher."