I got my P85 in July 2013 and I can absolutely confirm what Consumer Reports is saying.
My car has (and continues) to have all sorts of small fit-and-finish issues. While I've never had a drivetrain issue or any major problem, I have had some wireless and door handle issues that required as new Master Control Unit. Sadly, the work replacing the MCU introduced even more squeaks in the dashboard area :(
That all said: I still love the car and I expect I'll buy another Tesla some day in the future.
Right there with you. <3000mi on the car and the drive unit needed to be replaced, the front left strut area makes a popping when turning the wheel, and I can hear something flapping while driving.
My 2013 P85 was in for service 4 times before the alignment was fixed correctly. Sticky sunroof. Rattles. 12v battery failure causing full system failure. Motor replacement. Charge port battery broke.
2014 P85D: Total vehicle failure at 218 miles on the odometer. Front motor replaced. Rear motor milling failure. Rear motor replacement again as part incompatible with Autopilot.
That all being said, the service is painless and I still love my car. I'm not going back to BMW unless kicking and screaming.
I wonder how much post-purchase rationalization is going on there. With a $100,000+ car having to be serviced that many times - it sounds like a major inconvenience for people who work hard to make a living (so as to afford a $100K+ car).
Coming back and buying a new one one year after that then also breaks about a week after purchase and saying "Oh I still love it" shows that SJ's Reality distortion field is alive and kicking.
One of the trappings of luxury is a quiet cabin. If you're driving a nice car (that's not a sports car) you won't hear the engine. This used to be advertised heavily before it became standard on most decent cars.
I think the squeaks /u/Lightbody is describing are related to repairs, which are absolutely the last thing you want to do to a car, especially dash, headliner, doors, large non-mechanical areas.
Another trapping of high quality cars is fit and finish, which include things like smoothness of edges and gaps, flushness, door closing effort, paint quality, etc.
If you look at things like the edges of Tesla's components and the width of the gaps between doors, they are poor compared to (other) luxury cars. [1]
To be sure, I do think Teslas have AMAZING features, like handling and acceleration, but they do show their youth in fit and finish.
I don't get it. I have so little free time, the last thing I want to deal with is getting my car fixed. I have a Toyota Camry Hybrid and I have never had to do anything with it whatsoever, other than drive it whenever I want to
You are comparing rational approach to biased enthusiasts/early adopters one. Tesla has little to no appeal for common consumers, it just doesn't deliver much for ridiculous price, with many shortcomings.
But it's a new gadget, it shows where future is heading to. it's not there yet for most people.
Once it will deliver something for masses (ie 3x reach, maybe half-2/3 the power, half the price, no constant baby technology issues), people will be all over it. But in those 10-15 years, other manufacturers will have similar offers.
They are not standing idly - all have (coming) hybrid cars, many able to run for limited time in battery-only mode. Once market is big enough, they adapt their technologies to electric-only.
My mother's 2015 BMW 320d has needed to go back to the garage at 6 months old to have its sunroof replaced. A BMW 320d isn't especially high end, it's true - but I imagine that (aside from the engine...) it consists of mostly the same parts as something fancier like a BMW 335i or 335d.
My dad's 2011 BMW 640i, probably closer to the Tesla in terms of price point, seems to have been trouble free so far.
My 2012 M3 needed an entire new engine at 16k miles. Unfortunately, unlike a Tesla, replacing my motor can't be done in a couple hours (or for a couple grand).
My 2014 Fiat has started to turn into a rattle can. It is expected of these cars from what I've read. But considering I get 40+mpg, I'm fine with it rattling down the road.
My car has (and continues) to have all sorts of small fit-and-finish issues. While I've never had a drivetrain issue or any major problem, I have had some wireless and door handle issues that required as new Master Control Unit. Sadly, the work replacing the MCU introduced even more squeaks in the dashboard area :(
That all said: I still love the car and I expect I'll buy another Tesla some day in the future.