Hm. Ok, that's one interpretation that I didn't intend.
As a general rule, outside of exceptional situations, spouses take care of their kids together before they get around to taking care of themselves.
Kids are considered dependents and as such both parents will find that they will instinctively turn towards their children first in times of need. Whether that's always the rational thing to do is a different question but that seems to be the normal order of things.
When your child is doing fine and your spouse needs you the order is obviously different, need trumps play any day.
When we first became parents I put my son at the top spot and thus my wife and I have talked about this a good bit. We found that if we focus on each other it makes it overall better for everyone, including the kids. I guess how we look at it is family is #1 instead of breaking it down.
As a general rule, outside of exceptional situations, spouses take care of their kids together before they get around to taking care of themselves.
Kids are considered dependents and as such both parents will find that they will instinctively turn towards their children first in times of need. Whether that's always the rational thing to do is a different question but that seems to be the normal order of things.
When your child is doing fine and your spouse needs you the order is obviously different, need trumps play any day.