The Relay patterns are are decent starting point, but even if using Relay they're more-or-less optional
Relay connections (cursor-based pagination) are decent for many reasonable use cases, but if you absolutely do need random access (let's say you have a virtualized list where a user can scroll quickly to a specific point and load only the data local to it), you'll have to bring your own pagination solution.
The Relay way is one common style, but I wouldn't call anything a standard at this point. It feels to me like it's OK if this area needs some time to settle, as there are a few styles that work well for different use-cases, and people are still figuring out if there are better ways out there.
