You're right. To my credit, I haven't in years. It's an example of the "splitting" at the root of "schizo" which helps me be able to be a member of two contradictory groups at the same time until the contradictions build up and I get expelled from both. It is not so much about being deceptive but about sincerely seeing the humanity in everyone and trying to play both roles, though there is a way you get drawn into increasing levels of duplicity if you go down that route.
It's also a demonstration of how the "false self" comes out of having the experience of having to hide a vulnerability from people. (I really was prone to paranoid ideation, but the way I was treated in elementary school "proved" they really were out to get me. Boy was I furious at a friend of mine who showed contempt for the private school he went to because my parents were able to get me into private school for just one year and I was treated like... a human being and actually made some friends.) Schizotypes can oddly be very cagey sometimes yet they struggle to avoid random offputting statements that get them in trouble.
When I hear "I was bullied as a kid", I can't help but think of
It's also a demonstration of how the "false self" comes out of having the experience of having to hide a vulnerability from people. (I really was prone to paranoid ideation, but the way I was treated in elementary school "proved" they really were out to get me. Boy was I furious at a friend of mine who showed contempt for the private school he went to because my parents were able to get me into private school for just one year and I was treated like... a human being and actually made some friends.) Schizotypes can oddly be very cagey sometimes yet they struggle to avoid random offputting statements that get them in trouble.
When I hear "I was bullied as a kid", I can't help but think of
https://www.amazon.com/Loners-Life-Path-Unusual-Children/dp/...
and the interpretation of that book in
https://www.amazon.com/Schizotypy-Schizophrenia-View-Experim...
and wonder if Asperger's is just a fad diagnosis for this.