I lost my ex wife and cat to divorce last May. My world fell apart the day after my birthday. My mom has been in and out of the hospital since November... two weeks after the divorce was finalized.
Trying to "live my life" has been the only answer to the grief, but it also has been profoundly painful and unproductive. I don't feel like I'm actually making progress... just perpetually existing in this state where I can never get my needs met as every last ounce of support, love and any family connection drains out of me.
Try to think of things that would have made him happy or proud of you. Do those things not just for them... but for yourself too. Keep their memory alive through your words and actions.
Feel your feelings... I've had to spend a lot of time just sobbing. Absorbing it trying to let it pass over me... I try not to fight it anymore. In fact I think sometimes I embrace it too much. Eventually you get better at holding it and letting it go... like a breeze of wind.
You will never forget them, you will have their memory forever. I don't know what comes after the grief of how to get through it but I'm trying to hang on with every last bit of strength I have left.
As a fellow divorcee (minus 3 cats I miss dearly as well), it took me a while to realize that what I was feeling _was_ grief, and still is. I am now happily remarried to a woman who is certainly better for me, but even though it was ~5 years ago, I still feel pain and sadness from my divorce. It will never fully go away, it just becomes a scar that you're reminded of from time to time.
Trying to "live my life" has been the only answer to the grief, but it also has been profoundly painful and unproductive. I don't feel like I'm actually making progress... just perpetually existing in this state where I can never get my needs met as every last ounce of support, love and any family connection drains out of me.
Try to think of things that would have made him happy or proud of you. Do those things not just for them... but for yourself too. Keep their memory alive through your words and actions.
Feel your feelings... I've had to spend a lot of time just sobbing. Absorbing it trying to let it pass over me... I try not to fight it anymore. In fact I think sometimes I embrace it too much. Eventually you get better at holding it and letting it go... like a breeze of wind.
You will never forget them, you will have their memory forever. I don't know what comes after the grief of how to get through it but I'm trying to hang on with every last bit of strength I have left.