The commonly accepted solution, if this is an issue for you, is to run two instances of Emacs: one to edit in, and one to run EXWM. The days of "Eight Megs And Constantly Swapping" are well behind us; one can easily afford to run two (or many more) emacsen. And it can't be that much more bloated than, say, kwin...
Can you share more about your particular setup? I use a pretty vanilla setup of Doom emacs on Linux, and while I really wish to give exwm a try my experience with emacs has been too unstable so far. E.g. it sometimes crashes when it gets an I/O error trying to write a file (which happens when a USB drive is removed by accident). A more common annoyance is the entire program freezing while waiting for plugins that should be asynchronous, like Tramp or some LSP servers.