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We just have to get the media to portray geriatric men as sexy, and we'll be well on our way to living to 200!





I know you're joking, but it's women that get the short end of the stick in media.

Men are (within reason) considered handsome in media even in old age. Wrinkles and gray hair can be seen as sexy (again, within reason), but only in men.

Women are discarded or relegated to sexless granny roles (except maybe for comedic purposes, where sexuality is the butt of a joke). Actresses are replaced by younger women because they are not sexy enough even when their male equivalents aren't (looking at you, Top Gun: Maverick).

I'm not saying there aren't exceptions in particular movies that deal with this topic; I'm talking about the general trend.


When you ask men who they are attracted to, at least on the surface, it’s always young women. I’m pretty sure the OkCupid stats showed that girls age 20 give or take were peak attractiveness. Reality is of course that guys will “work for food” or attention.

Women are different. It ranges — alot, and is more about EQ and scarcity. If you have a moderate baseline level of physical attractiveness, moderately fit (Jon two miles let’s say), not an asshole, and not living with mom, a 40-60 year old guy is a hot commodity.


If you’ve never stumbled across the older OkCupid blog posts or Christian Rudder’s book (Dataclysm[1]) then I can’t recommend them enough. Super interesting content delivered by a smart and engaging writer

[1] https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/21480734-dataclysm


This all makes perfect sense from a fertility (and thus natural selection) perspective.

Agreed, but once you reach 60 (like Cruise and McGillis) you're well beyond the forces of natural selection and into the unnatural realm that our longer lives have granted us. Both of these actors are outcompeted in real life by younger people (sex/reproduction wise) yet one of them is still able to secure billing in "sexy roles" and the other isn't... and this is just one example.

This could be natural selection acting against us, but since modern society is artificial anyway, why not make an effort to combat it?


> you're well beyond the forces of natural selection

Are you? By all appearances this is a direct result of it. Visual indicators of age haven't been selected against in and of themselves as strongly with regards to men but a great many related things have been.

Arguably your specific example might constitute an edge case that historically didn't occur with enough frequency to be selected against. Seems like little more than a curiosity to me.

> why not make an effort to combat it?

I don't follow. What are you arguing for here?


> Are you? By all appearances this is a direct result of it.

This is a result of it when it no longer matters, in adults who no longer matter for breeding purposes. When natural selection acts on humans of age 60+, it's mostly irrelevant. There's nothing to select, they've already done their part. It's just that natural selection is blind and doesn't "know" when to stop -- but we humans know better (this is what I meant later by combat/countering it).

> Arguably your specific example might constitute an edge case that historically didn't occur with enough frequency to be selected against. Seems like little more than a curiosity to me.

Why would it be selected against? All else being equal, natural selection wouldn't exert any particular pressure on old people after they've passed their genes. It's "blind" to them. It certainly doesn't know anything about being media star material! ;)

But it's not an "edge case" for modern humans, especially as we live longer and keep working well into our later years. Modern society doesn't always resemble what the forces of natural selection act upon anyway.

> What are you arguing for here?

The same as the thread starter, only with a focus on women since they get the short end of the stick in this aspect (in media).


Except this seems like a direct result of natural selection, because older men can still pass on their genes. Older women can not as readily pass them on.

Well, like I said, this is a result of it when it no longer matters. For reference, we're talking about 60+ year old men.

And, like I also said, modern humans and our society don't reflect natural selection anyway; many things we do are "unnatural".


> modern humans and our society don't reflect natural selection anyway; many things we do are "unnatural".

That's simply not true. Don't get hung up on the word "natural". It's nothing more than the result of a biased random walk (at least until the eugenicists get involved, at which point it goes meta).

Some of the things selected for can get pretty abstract. Cooperative behavior for example. Despite often being to the short term detriment of the individual it is observed in the wild.


I don't think it's false. The forces at play in modern society are no longer (alone) those of natural selection. This has been remarked on by people like Stephen Jay Gould. Society/culture evolves along different (faster) lines. We do a lot that makes no sense from the perspective of natural selection.

Progressively fewer men 40+ want kids.

We are by nature dopamine machines, and will try to hit it as long as possible.


Yes, that was exactly my point. The edge case is the potential for the selected behavior to work against reproductive fitness - someone young finding someone old attractive even though they aren't likely to get good offspring out of it.

I'm still not clear what you're arguing for. It isn't media giving women the short end of the stick, it's biology. What exactly are you proposing be done about it? I'm not even clear why it's a problem aside from the general desire that scientific advancement should eventually cure us of age related phenomena entirely.


Well, it's a problem for actresses for example.

Men season, while women age - The media's portrayal of desirability of old people is a reflection of societal preferences, not the other way around.

Men become wiser, skilled, kinder, more patient and often better providers. Women tend to become argumentative, quarrelsome, bitter (especially those who date often) and rewarded for it. They also tend to dissociate love from sex and manipulate one for the other.


I hope your second paragraph is not what you truly believe, but that you're describing a regrettable stereotype.

There would appear to be two poles of explanation - that either the media is reflecting desires and not influencing it, or that the media is influencing desires and not reflecting them - or somewhere in-between.

The reflection of biological reality appears easier to justify: that men remain fertile for longer, that the attractive qualities that women care about most (e.g. wealth and personality) tend to improve with age; and that a women's attractiveness is most tied to her skin, which we all know shows aging the most on the body, and is a sign of her reproductive health or ability.

I'm not sure what the argument for the media being able to influence males to the extent suggested would be? Older men were marrying younger women before the printing press, so where did this pressure originate? And what is its mechanism of action?


I'm not saying media is influencing this; this preference clearly showed before media! The media here clearly reflects a preexisting preference, but in my opinion, it also makes the world worse for old people, especially women and actresses.

I'm saying media could be changed from this tendency, since this preference is less relevant in modern society and it hurts actresses. Media is a human construct that can be adapted to new needs, it's not a tool of natural selection!

Changing media wouldn't change the sexual preferences of men, and nowhere am I arguing this. It's like inclusivity in media -- is it ever going to eradicate racism? No, but it will make the world a tiny bit fairer.


I agree that falling back on "it's natural" can be a poor excuse, mainly because humans have the power and intellect (maybe not intelligence, but I digress) to change even what is considered nature, but I'm also not for social engineering, and I've seen such a wild increase in social engineering in media over the past 15, maybe 20 years, that I'd err on the naturalistic side now.

Exactly - there's no female equivalent of "silver fox."

The kids call them cougars or MILF’s

Even they have an earlier "expiration" date than men in cinema and TV. Women are considered sexy for a far shorter period of time.

With this specific example, if McGillis had spent as much time and money and effort on appearing young and attractive as Tom Cruise has, maybe she would have been back in her role as well.

Oh, agreed! But it seems that men can remain "viable love interests" as long as they keep their rugged good looks (yes, with cosmetic help, of course), but in women this takes a stronger requirement of looking youthful.

Uh, yes there is. Pretty sure there's even an acronym for it.



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