Me too. I was in a very dark place for a long time until a couple months ago. My views on life and death haven't changed but I'm not actively rooting for my own death anymore, at least.

Embracing the solitude and the mindset that no one is coming to save me has sparked a bunch of motivation (out of spite) to improve myself. Started to workout regularly which has been a huge help for my mind and body. Starting to peel back layers of things that happened during childhood now.

Wish you the best of luck on your journey.